#811

• What did the painter say to the wall?
• One more crack, and I'll plaster you.

#812

• What did the can say to the can opener?
• You make me flip my lid.

#813

• What did the witch put in her hair?
• Scare spray.

#814

• What do teddy bears like to have in their houses?
• Fur-niture.

#815

• What's as sharp as a vampire's fang?
• His other fang.

#816

• What kind of letters would you send to capital cities?
• Capital letters.

#817

• What is a volcano?
• A mountain with the hiccups.

#818

• What is the most military day of the year?
• March 4th.

#819

• What do termites eat for breakfast?
• Oakmeal.

#820

• What do massage therapists eat for dinner?
• Spa-ghetti.