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#200

I would like to take a moment to respond to this guy "Michael" who made fun of me. Listen up, bucko boy, I am way better than you! My betterness is so stultifyingly dazzling it lights up the sky, whereas you are a gasbagical buffoon. You're just jealous because I have so many great thoughts and you have, like, none. Why, even now, as I upbraid you for your silly little tantrum, I am expounding on my two hundredth thought. How many thoughts have you had, dingwit? What's that, you say? So little, you can't keep count? Yeah, I thought so. That's why I have the "I Think" column, and you have the nothing at all column. But I could just imagine what a column about your thoughts would be like. There would be so few, they'd have to be numbered with negative numbers, probably. Thought number -4: "Duh, uh, uh, uh, I think...toast." Ooooh, that's a good one! People will be enlightened for generations to come over the wisdom of this thought! And let's not forget my favorite, thought number -7: "Duh, uh, uh, uh, I think...dork." Oh, however will I adequately shield my eyes from the brilliant light of number -7!? I should just quit thinking now! The competition is just too great! I'm gonna have to take a severe helping of How Would You Like Me To Shut Your Big Fat Mouth For You? just to cope! Oh wait! I forgot I don't live in the Land of Let's Pretend You're Not a Dundergoob! Ha! Boy do I feel foolish now! For a moment there, I was almost convinced you weren't a total stupid bag! Whoa! Oh wait! Actually, I wasn't nearly almost convinced at all! Because you stinko, finko!! BURN!!!!