RinkWorks: Stupid Emails: an experience of self-discovery

383. an experience of self-discovery

To:  <sam@rinkworks.com>
Subject:  romance tips website
Date:  Mon, 19 Sep 2005 16:58:02 -0400

    I'm sorry, I don't typically comments on website like this, but this one
just disgusted/amused me too much to not. I certainly hope that this website is
a joke, but I don't think it is.
    No wonder men don't understand women - if they listened to the advice on
this website, the human race would slowly die out due to lack of reproduction. I
think that readers of this website need to take a few simple facts to heart.
1. yes, women are sentimental and we do enjoy receiving such tokens as greeting
cards. However, I would never suggest simply signing your name at the bottom and
wait for her to swoon in your arms - what she's looking for is thought and
meaning aka an endearing but not sloppily mushy note.
2. If you started calling any self-respecting woman "Sweetie Pumpkin Pookums"
or even worse "Snookie Wookum Weetie Bunny Pie" you'd better be prepared to jump
back quickly to avoid the wave of vomit launched towards your shoes. If you're
lucky, you might simply receive a look of utter disgust or embarrassment
3. The best relationships are build on friendship and a great deal of mutual
respect - I'm not saying to treat her like one of the guys, but instead of
thinking up some ridiculous pet name or planning to buy tiny radishes because
they're "cute", you'd get a lot farther by writing her a love letter (or poem if
you're really inspired), or just listening to her - everyone likes to talk about
themselves and it'll help you discover her interests and just get a better idea
of her whole personality.
4. Finally, leave the stereotypes at the door. Don't listen to the lies that
"all girls are like this" or "every chick loves this stuff" - you'll get allot
farther with romance and have a happier relationship if you take the time to
find her personal likes and dislikes - because after all, everyone's different.

So sorry to lecture, I hope this helps some of those poor lost men out there. If
this email is even read, which I doubt. Oh well, it was an experience of
self-discovery just to write it.