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It's a Bad, Bad, Bad, Bad Movie

Reader Review

Batman (1966)

Posted by: Faux Pas
Date Submitted: Monday, March 22, 1999 at 12:49:24
Date Posted: Monday, March 29, 1999 at 04:23:33

Batman (1966), Batman Returns, Batman Forever, Batman & Robin, Son of Batman, Bride of Batman, Batman Revisited, Batman VIII: Batman Takes Manhattan.

Yes, that's right, all the Batman movies save the first Michael Keaton one and the two animated movies. Here we've got Adam West, Michael Keaton, Val Kilmer, and George Clooney starring as Batmen, assisted by Burt Ward and Chris O'Donnell as Robins and Alicia Silverstone as Batgirl, going up against not only Ceser Romero as the Joker, but also Jim Carrey and Frank Gorshin as the Riddlers, Danny DeVito and Burgess Meredith as the Penguins, Tommy Lee Jones as Two-Face, Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy, Arnold Schwarzenegger as Mister Freeze, Some Guy as Bane, and Michelle Pfeiffer and Lee Meriwether as Catwomen! With a fantastic cast like that, how can you lose?

Ever see "Club Paradise?"

This review, along with the next several, will cover all these movies in detail.

Starting with Adam West's Batman, it's supposed to be bad. Tilted camera angles in the bad guy's lairs, villains not-really disguised, Bruce Wayne's seduction of/by Kitka, inflatable henchmen, Bat-this, Bat-that, the Penguin Sub. It brings a tear to my eye. It's that beautiful. In it, the Penguin, Catwoman, Riddler, and Joker team up to take over the world! It's up to the dynamic duo to stop the diabolical quartet from dehydrating the world's leaders! You can almost feel the tension (it reads "TENSION!" in big orange letters, later replaced by a bright blue "ZA-POW!") -- now that I think of it, this is the best of the Batman movies. You kids these days with your rocket-propelled penguins and your ice-ray guns! Back when I was a crime fighter, we had to deal with exploding sharks and springboards that launched you into a deadly octopus if you weren't careful! We had to escape from sinister death-traps every half-hour! We had to dance the Bat-tusi! And we didn't kill off the villain at the end of each movie! Oh no -- we sent them to prison, where they belong!

Sorry about that.

Anyway, 4 turkeys for this one.

Scene to watch for: Dehydrated Hooligans -- Just Add Water!

Best line: "Some days you just can't get rid of a bomb!"

Things that make you go "Huh?": C'mon, it's the United Nations we're talking about here. Like anyone takes them seriously.

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